Embracing Your Inner Fairy: How to Romanticize Life and Rediscover Joy

When I was a little girl, I used to love fairies, shiny rocks, mermaids and all things whimsical and fantasy. When I grew into a teenager, and an adult, that had dwindled. There is so much pressure from society to 'be realistic', and to 'be mature' that we often don't even ask why. I used to carry a fiction book with me everywhere. Any minute I had a chance to read, I'd peel open the book and go on an adventure. I'd live thousands of lives in just four hundred pages and be elated.

I used to get asked, 'who do you want to be when you grow up?' I would answer, "a fairy". I would hear so often around me when I began to awaken into my spiritual self, "You need to learn to be human". Ugh! It was so frustrating. It felt like I couldn't enjoy what I liked, and instead, had to change to become someone more acceptable. But I listened. I created 'realistic' goals, and became more mature. I tried to learn what it meant to be human, and live as a human.

But after awhile, the old passion started calling. I was afraid to say yes to them. But then I began to think, when I used to enjoy those things, was when I was truly happiest. So what if holding onto that sense of wonder and whimsy could actually make life more joyful? What if reconnecting with my inner child and embracing a playful, imaginative mindset could actually help me in life rather than derail me from my goals? What if I actually needed her more than the adult version?

Why We Lose Touch with Our Inner Magic

The world is full of possibility and magic. As a child, I would talk to the trees, go on walks in the woods and make up stories in my head about nature and life unfolding around me. I would see carving in trees, and hug them. I would talk to frogs and stare at them as they stared back. I was in the very present moment.

But as I grew up and embraced becoming 'more serious', and 'mature', I stopped living in the present moment. I started to prioritize responsibility, fitting in, and what it meant to be someone acceptable. But I lost my free spirited nature.

The shift at the time was important, because it put me into the extreme opposite. Which allowed me to understand a different aspect of myself. It trained me, and I grew. Those traits I learned were good ones. But they shouldn't have come at the cost of my joy and creativity. That was buried under the stress of perfectionism, productivity, and self-criticism. The little girl who talked to frogs? She didn't worry about if that was productive or not, she just enjoyed it. The girl who read books for hours? She wasn't on her phone comparing herself to others.

The question is not, do we have to give up that part of ourselves? Its, how do we balance both in life? And how will balance help both keep the magic alive while still allowing us to live in the real world?

Use Your Imagination!

One big important step I ask everyone is this: how do you talk to yourself? Do you tell yourself you have to 'be human', 'do more', look a certain way to others? That's so exhausting trying to keep that image up all of the time. So much thinking, planning and strategizing to have yourself come across a certain way or act a certain way. It prevents you from being allowed to just be you.

One way to reconnect with your inner child is through the stories you tell yourself. Instead of whatever loop is going on inside your head projected from other people, try 'well what if I was a dragon today?', or "what if I was a fairy today? How would she live out her day? How would she choose to spend her time?" You don't escape reality and become ungrounded, instead you use your imagination to help you navigate it in a way that's much more fun and freeing!

Ideas to help you:

• My Character Creation: Create a pinterest board (my favorite), title it "my character", then add a ton of images to it that you like. Can be fantasy, can be from stories, can be pretty clothes, can be whatever you want it to be. But let go of the 'realism' of it. Let loose, get silly. Maybe find some images of cute animals being playful. When you create it, make sure you feel excited, feel joy from it. If it doesn't make you smile, then make a new character! Once it's created, do one little thing every day that reminds you of that board. This will help you tune into the energy of that person, and slowly become it.

• Treasure Hunting: Go for a walk, bring a cute bag with you (something that can carry lots of things! A cute tote may be in order), cast your eyes all around you, look at the ground, the trees, the flowers. Pick up an acorn that looks like a fairy hat, put it in your bag. Pick up a rock that has some shininess on it, pretend it holds a magical power inside that's going to help you all week. You can even make a list before going out on all the 'ingredients' you need for a 'potion' back at home. Pick up a jar from a thrift shop on the way home, and fill it with all of your trinkets. Call it the Potion of Magic, or A Jar of Dreams.

• Romanticize the little things: Remember when you were a kid, and you would see a rainbow on the street after it rained? Or when the sunlight made the river sparkle? Go for a walk, or take a blanket somewhere, and just go stare. Life is hard. It is. No one is denying that. But life is also beautiful. And when we only focus on the hard stuff, we forget how beautiful life can truly be. Take back your power in this way. See if you can spot angel wings in trees. Change positions so you can bend the light to beam through the leaves. Look for little critters or animals.

• Quests instead of errands: There are those annoying things you just do not want to do. Going to the grocery store, cleaning, running errands. When you read them, don't they just sound so mundane? That's how narration can be so life changing. What if going to the grocery store became a quest that you needed to fulfill? Make a fun little to do list with some colored pens. Bring a FUN PEN with you. Check your items off the list. Play music in your ears while you do - something fantastical or nature oriented. Pretend you are the one picking each item up from somewhere around the world, just to help nourish your beautiful body. Cleaning? Blast music, dance with the vacuum, talk to your house (it has a spirit), say things like 'i'm cleaning all the energy up from the week.' or 'as I clean my room, my body, heart and mind also gets cleaned!",

  
  

The day can become so much more magical if you just adjust a few tiny things. Notice how none of those suggestions took you away from reality? Instead it brought you in it, made you more present, and allowed you to connect to yourself and life around you.

Letting Go of Perfectionism Through Whimsy

We all hear it "perfectionism isn't real", okay but we try to make it real. And even if we know that it isn't, society does a pretty good job of making you think that it is every where you look. Perfectionism demands flawless performance. It leads you to creating high expectations that are usually only possible with burn out after. And even when we try to set lower expectations usually we feel sad, or disappointed in ourselves after.

So try taking a lighter approach. When you allow yourself to be silly, and open the door to creativity, thats when joy can filter in.

For example, if you make a mistake at work or home, imagine you experimented with a spell and it went 'wrong'. But the only way to learn, is by practicing! This mindset can totally shift how you feel. Or if you're too tired to go out and treasure hunt, or look around you try making a really cozy safe space.

Home is where you should feel the most safe. Instead of creating a character, create a pinterest board on what makes your inner child feel calm, loved and taken care of.

If your day was stressful, make yourself some tea at home, talk to the water (it has consciousness). Stir the tea, tell it that this warm liquid is going to relax your body, bones, and help you feel calm. Maybe even pick out a special mug only for days when you want to feel taken care of and held. Call it your Inner Child Mug. Or your Mermaid Mug, for when you want to connect to water, and become more fluid.

Romanticizing Life When Life Gets Busy

Romanticizing life means seeing the extraordinary in the ordinary. It’s about appreciating the small details that often go unnoticed. But sometimes we just don't have the energy for going out and doing things. So instead, some more simple approaches:

• Lay on the couch or bed, listen to some music that's dreamy, atmospheric, or ambient. Close your eyes and think about some of your favorite days in life. Let yourself go through the whole scene, smile. This is a simple way to shift your energy to peace.

• Every time you eat a meal, think about your health going up. It's refilling your magic, your ability to get stronger. Each bite, causes you to accelerate in your wisdom and knowledge. As the food is digested all old information that isn't needed drifts away, and new space is created!

• Scroll through peaceful places you would like to visit, pretend you're going on adventures there. Envision yourself on that hike through those mountains. Imagine yourself drinking a smoothie while staring at a turquoise ocean. Envision what it feels like to be on your dream vacation. Play some music that is related to those same sounds of that place. This is how you ~manifest ~ as well as telling your brain you've done it ahead of time. Your brain doesn't know the difference between what you envision and feel, vs what you see and feel on the outside!

• And if you feel like loving yourself and writing. Write a letter to your inner child, reminding her how loved and valued she is. Read the letter back to yourself, and give yourself a nice long hug.

  
  

Life should feel peaceful. You don't have to be happy all the time. And you can feel multiple emotions at once. You can feel peace and sadness at the same time. You can feel tired and joy at the same time. But you deserve to be who you are. And sometimes that might look like shedding off the layers of the self you were conditioned and told you had to be. But there is a version of you inside that has always been waiting to reconnect with you.

She isn't mad at you. And she isn't disappointed in you. She just wants wants to connect with you.

So if you made it this far. I'm proud of you for all that you have done in your life. All that you have created for yourself. The work you put in? It's incredible. All of the ways that you've tried again and again, and kept creating hope that there was more, even when you were exhausted. I'm proud of you. And your inner child? They are too.

Because what was all that work for? You were building a life for them. You were building a life that you could feel safe in to finally be yourself again. And you have. So now take all the armor off, and give yourself permission to rest and be.